222th post~
yet another day juz past lyk that..
woke up 11 plus..
chatted on the phone with my love counsellor..
she was right tho..
we have the same thoughts..
and i also think the way she did..
thats great but kinda of sad too..
cos i know i'm getting myself hurt once more..
after that chatted with my sis..
she named herself the lovedoctor-.-
she juz talk lyk the love counsellor..
same thinking all those..
so i bet that will really come true real fast..
so, worked today from 4 to 1o..
has been since cny i have not been working for night shift le..
and damn la..
chief cashier caught me using handphone..
she asked me keep in locker but i juz hackcare her lo..
after work went for jy de bd bbq..
and they forced me to eat can-.-
den slacked dao 12 lyk that jiu went off liao..
chatted on the phone on the way home..
bathe liao jiu start using com till now..
need to go do some stuff soon le..

i juz cant stop laughing when i read that post la..
is damn funny de can lols..
but if you dare try that den you see wad will happen to you lo..
face the consequences den..

okay..
i think some sort i have become numb already..
i cant cry anymore..
for the past few days even if i'm very sad and i forced my tears out it still wont come out..
but i dunno why i'd cry today..
the way you thanks me juz gave me an urge to cry..
as wad i have said, i'm not moving an inch..
you can have my words..
but can you juz be happy ma?
you said i was the only person who can changed your mood..
the same goes to you too..
you're the only person who can changed my mood too..
so why cant you think lesser..
think so much you also say no use le..
only make you more confused only..
and seriously i'm asking you..
if i said all that earlier really got use ma?
you only have that person on your mind..
you only think that he did all this because she is his first one..
so you dun mind right..
you wanted to try and see whether the same thing is gonna happen to you..
you said try le den will know ma..
but do you know after trying you will get hurt ma?
how many times do i have to repeat this..
i dun wish to see you get hurt..
you think i really wish to see a show ar?
after seeing you get hurt i also will felt hurt and sad all those de ma..
you think i will really be happy meh?
you asked me to be happy so i'm wearing a smile on my face now..
yet you show it out to me that you feel sad all those..
can you juz follow wad your heart want ma?
dun always make yourself till so confused lyk that..
no use de..
the more you think, the more you will feel hurt..
rmb wad i had said..
you are the gamemaster..
you control the game not the game contol you..
you control everybody fate in the game whether to win to lose..
nobody can win without your assist de..
think hard..
think wad you really want..
think whether you wan a short time of sweetness in exchange for a long term of hurt ma..
think who's treating you better..
think who're you really happy with..
think who can you really communicate with..
think who will always be there for you..
lack of communication is lethal in a relationship..
i think you know this better than anyone ba..
but i think i say so much now also like no use like that le..
you cant absorbed what i say anymore..
you said you are tired..
but i dun believe you will juz stop thinking lo..
can you juz stop thinking how pple look at you ma..
this will really help alot if you juz stop thinking for a moment..
shall stop now and you go do some thinking ba..

ps. i love my lovecounsellor and lovedoctor :)